Coping with Loss

A beautiful quote goes, “Grief is just love with no place to go.”. With no person to receive our love, hold our hand or return our smile, grief is love we don’t know how to handle – an emotion powerful enough to bring a lump to our throats and tears to our eyes, definitely, but also to alter the tenor of our lives and make it something different altogether.

The natural ecstasy that we are born with as children is sorely tested by things that cause us grief. And as adults we become even more susceptible to that ravages of this fierce emotion on our senses – because the tragedies and traumas of adulthood lurk around every corner. Death, divorce, accidents, illnesses, loss of health or loss of family or financial stability – so many everyday problems can slowly segue into a situation that leaves us overwhelmed and unsure how to cope.

Sadly, we live in times of uncertainty when grief, melancholy and a sense of loss are upon us. On the flip though, we are fortunate to be linked to each other through modern technology, which makes it possible for us to reach out for help, and in turn to  help others. Almost as on person, all the spiritual leaders, life coaches and inspirational speakers of the world have risen to the occasion, flooding our lives with messages of hope, the force of human will, the essentially happy nature of life and not the least, the immense power of eternal optimism.

Deepak Chopra, the world-famous meditation teacher, advises us to find and identify that turbulent emotion disturbing our lives and to be still with it as long as we need to. Rather than “stay strong” or ignoring our pain, he says we must confront it, label it for what it is, and give it time to run its course and work its way out of our system. He even provides us with a guided meditation that helps us work ourselves into a position of fortitude from where we can wait for the feeling of loss to slowly dissipate. Read Chopra’s own words here: https://chopra.com/articles/healing-after-loss-meditation-for-grieving

Tony Ribbons, renowned motivational speaker, identifies three ways grief can cripple us: “loss” – the intial recognition that something has left our lives and cannot be brought back; “less” – we are less of ourselves and our lives will be less because of our loss; and finally “never” – we feel life will never be the same again, and we can never overcome the clenching grip of sadness. He advises us to make a choice – to consciously choose joy, and to set aside our pain to look at the beauty of life instead. Read this https://www.tonyrobbins.com/dealing-with-grief/ to know more.

Sadhguru, celebrated spiritual leader and Guru, cautions us that grief will run its course. The first step, he says, is to let the initial days and weeks wash over us till their power to weaken us dissolves. After that, he guides us artfully, to look at, absorb and realize the essential nature of life. He narrates the touching story of a man, who, when faced with shattering loss, turns a calamity into an opportunity, and how compassion during our saddest moments can raise us to become far better versions of ourselves. Read more of that story here: https://isha.sadhguru.org/us/en/wisdom/article/can-grief-be-vehicle-for-growth.

The current times then, are admittedly testing times, but there are also avenues out of such trying moments – and the secret is for us to realize that every such moment is an opportunity for us to understand what life is really all about, to raise ourselves past what is within our reach, and to move past the grief to the ecstasy that surely lies beyond.